Jokes....Jokes....Jokes

A Helpful Man

A man is driving down the road and notices a car in the ditch. He doesn't usually help many people so he drives on by. Then he notices that a pretty woman is the driver so he goes back to help.

As he is hooking his truck to her car he says, “You know, you are the first pregnant woman I've ever helped out of a ditch.”

“But I'm not pregnant,” she says.

“Well, you're not out of the ditch yet,” he says.

Evergreen Tree

This Avon lady was out selling her wares. She got on an elevator and pressed the button for the fifth floor. Suddenly, she let a fart. She thought to herself, “What am I going to do now?'' She pulled a can of pine-scented air freshener out of her satchel and sprayed it all around her.”

The door to the elevator opened on the third floor and a rather inebriated man gets on. The door closes and suddenly he gets a whiff and exclaims, “Smells like somebody shit on the evergreen tree!”